Dealing with your Relatives
Choose the right medium of communication
According to our surveys, the need for assistance to deal with your relative has been reported.
These are examples of Messages From Childhood: your thought, feelings, and actions may have been controlled all your life. The following rules, attitudes, tactics, assumptions, and behaviors may be modified to more efficient and adaptive ones through cognitive therapy:
I have to excel in everything I undertake in order to be satisfied. As a human, my worth depends on what others think of me. It means they don’t like me if anyone disagrees with me. Without a guy (a woman), I can’t live. When I make a mistake, that means I’m incompetent. I must be welcomed by all people at all times in order to be content. You should always be polite to them if you want people to like you. Don’t confront them ever.
At all times, one must have complete control over life. Holding humans at a distance is better. They won’t like me until they really get to know me. Others can make mistakes and break the norms, but I can’t. Protection is extremely essential. Even if it is full of negatives, it is safer to stick with the protection of the known. Since I feel that I am worthless, others must also believe that I am worthless. It is risky to trust someone.
I do not burden my problems on anyone. If I don’t do my best and achieve success all the time people won’t like me and I’m going to be unloved and worthless. If there is a possibility that there might be something dangerous or scary, one should think about it. One needs to depend on someone stronger than himself. My history is an all-important determinant of my current actions and it will still affect me if anything once deeply shaped me.
Source: https://cognitivetherapymd.com/9543.html
Here are some videos about dealing with your relatives.
Verbal Self-defence
Learn how to defend yourself verbally in different situations?
Read a great article about dealing with relatives
If you can hold your head while everything is about you,
losing theirs, and blaming you for it;
If you can trust yourself when you are questioned by all citizens,
But also make allowance for doubting them;
If by waiting, you can wait and not be tired,
Or being lied to not coping with lies,
Or don’t give in to hating being hated,
And yet do not look too fine, and do not speak too wisely;
If you can dream, and not make your master dreams,
If you can think and not think about your goal,
If you can live with victory and tragedy,
And treat exactly the same thing with those two imposters;
You’ve spoken the truth if you can bear to hear it.
Twisted by knaves to build a fool’s pit,
Or look at the stuff that you gave your life to destroy,
And stoop and build with worn-out instruments;
If you can make a pile of all your winnings, then
And gamble it on a single pitch-and-toss turn,
And lose, and begin with your beginnings again
And never breathe a word concerning your loss;
If your heart and nerve and sinew can be pushed
To serve your turn long after they’ve vanished,
And then hang on when you have nothing left of you,
Except for the Will that says: “Hang on to them;
If you can converse with crowds and maintain your virtue,
Or walk with or lose social contact with kings;
If you can be hurt by neither enemies nor loving friends;
If you count all men, but none too much;
If the unforgiving minute can be filled by you
With a distance run of sixty seconds’ worth –
Yours is the World and all that is in it,
And what’s more, you’re going to be a man, my child!
– by Rudyard Kipling
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